DIARRHEA OF A MADMAN!
The personal homepage of ME, Dave Brockie. This site is my personal rant-arena and look-at-me-I'm-cool page. Don't use it to try to keep up with GWAR, DBX, or anything else I do but remember everything else you hear about me (which is probably nothing) is a lie! Located on the GWAR server, under the watchful eye of Scott D. cyber-slave extraodinare, this site will continue to grow and mutate (at a snail's pace) so check back often (if you enjoy being disappointed). I enjoy peeing with the door open, while eating cold Beefaroni right out of the can.
Brockie, age 4, after he saw a picture of Balsac's face
UPDATEUPDATEUPDATEUPDATEUPDATEUPDATEUPDATEUPDATE
Slave Pit shareholders meeting, Jan. 25th, 2010
(from left to right, Mike Bonner, Mike Bishop, Don Drakulich, Matt Maguire, Danny Black, Bob Gorman, Scott Krahl, Mike Derks, Brad Roberts, Cory Smoot, Davis Bradley. Not pictured is Dave Brockie as we couldn’t figure out the timer on the camera and somebody had to take the fucking picture)
The House of Mike and Dave, Jan. 31th, 2010
…and welcome to the next decade. Let’s hope it doesn’t suck as bad as the last one! Aren’t you glad the whatever you call the first ten years of this century are over? I was asked recently what I thought of this time*, and it caught me off guard as I realized I really didn’t have a feeling for it…it was kind of like being dead. September 11th, 2001 ruined the rest of the decade for most, while others found it hilarious. Despite GWAR’s best attempts to save “the oughties”, they blew... 911 was like two gigantic tombstones presiding over a gaping mass grave that swallowed up just about everything cool for the last ten years. We are left with a ruined economy and a “forever war”.
But it wasn’t all for naught…Oderus is still on FOX News!
Ahhh…2010…it just sounds cool. Really, after eight years of George Bush Jr., wouldn’t anything be an improvement? Kinda like the Redskins…(and hiring Shanahan won’t help unless we get rid of that name). So here we are, a new decade laid out before us, just begging to be fucked (have you had sex in the new decade?) And how do we go about fucking the new decade? Put your faith in GWAR, of course! Because if the “oughties” sucked in many ways, it didn’t suck for GWAR. We went from being the biggest joke in metal to actually becoming a band again. We toured relentlessly and finally headlined the Sounds of the Underground Tour (into the ground!). We signed with a new label, drove it into destruction, and returned to Metal Blade. We got back to Europe and played our biggest show in history at the Wacken Festival. And the 25th Anniversary of GWAR saw us raise our hideous standard in places unthinkable as Oderus became the official “Interplanetary Correspondent” for the FOX News late-night talk show, “Red Eye”, hosted by the delightfully dimpled Greg Gutfeld. Un-deterred by a sagging economy and an un-winnable war (indeed, inspired by…) GWAR marches on. Or at least collapses down a flight of stairs, right into a scurrying procession of heavily –laden Brazilian waiters!
So what does this next year hold for GWAR? Well, we will get to that soon enough, but for right now I intend to concentrate on ME for a little while…well, not actually me, more like YOU, or at least this list of people who have been waiting around for the art they have ordered from me. Yes, that’s right, it’s the “gosh I am sorry I am so lame about getting this stuff done but SHIT one man can only do so much!” part of the website. Of course there are all the lies that I told… but some of you will be happy to know that for at least the first six weeks of this year that I will be hanging out in my studio, getting caught up with this massive pile of unfinished commissions! So check these pages for further developments…here’s a re-working of “Servant of Death’s Head” for Dave in Cleveland!
Contact me at maggotmaster13@gmail.com if you want to get your hands on original Brockie art, whether its Oderus masks and hands, prints of classic Brockie illustrations, custom-made pieces of all description, DEATH PIGGY singles and CD’s and much, much, more! There is a considerable demand for this stuff so get your paws on some NOW before it is TOO LATE. And just remember, everybody needs a Brockie on their wall.
I suppose this is the part where the evil overlords of GWAR sit back, count beans, and plan accordingly. We plan to tour the shit out of “LUST IN SPACE” so look for a full announcement pertaining to all things GWAR very soon…I know we are already booked for a bunch of Europe festivals and there are rumors of another U.S. run in the spring. As far as studio projects, well let me tell you that there is a bunch of cool stuff brewing. We want to take this momentum we have seized and continue to build on it…and we have the perfect project to do just that…but I can’t say anything else…yet.
Friend me on Facebook. Keep up with my book at www.rvanews.com. Hire Chris Bopst to suck off your child.
Now I’m gonna go pop off with my top off!
*did anyone catch the Oderus Sirius radio take over on Liquid Metal? Cool shit!
Miss an update? Impossible! Go here to reminisce...
FUN PLACES TO WASTE TIME
Money For Art
Trade worthless sheckles for valuable prizes--
CHECK BACK OFTEN FOR NEW PIECES!
Chippy!
The sad and continuing saga of Chippy the Chippapotomas
Stupid!
Because you need to feel better
about yourself
Metal Has Replaced Slavery
Malcontents Unite to Make Loud Noises
Violence Has Arrived
Thoughts on our new dumb-ass war
Mild in the Streets
Undercover reporter exposes IMF protests as silly
Dave Brockie Experience
My new band (where I get drunk and act like an idiot)
Whargoul
If you like undead Nazi's this page is for you!
Richmond Sucks!
If you can't make good art, criticize someone else's
F-Minus Art Gallery
Squiggles, white-out, confusion...
Arrrrrrr!
The bloody epic of Blackbeard, terror
of the Atlantic!
Slave Pit Studios
Record your band with the pros, or at least someone that knows them
Here's the Guestbook - currently broken
Update Dec. 10th, 2009...
...almost done! And here's my latest...for a band called "Trog"...I think they are gonna do an action figure or something with it as well. As you can see I have gotten a lot of shit done this tour but as usual there are many people still waiting for their work...I am doing my best and even though I didnt get as much done as I would have liked to I can look forward to taking the rest of Dec. and all of Jan. and finally getting caught up with everything! And then headlong into a bunch of new projects, none of which I can mention now.
"Trog" |
At the end of this tour I feel better than I have in years, fully recovered from that pesky herniated disc I got a few years back. GWAR is kicking ass, my column is still going strong at www.rvanews.com (just look under the GWAR section), and Oderus is still officially an interplanetary correspondent for FOX New's Red Eye!
I have been cataloging a lot of the mayhem of the last year on my Facebook page...so friend me, but plz dont invite me to your Mob Wars game, or your vampire clan, or put up stupid bullshit on my page. That is what the comments section is for.
And if I owe you work, plz be patient! It's getting there and I am reasonably sure I will have everything wrapped up by the end of January. Look for another update before the whore-a-days! And no, there is no New Years Show...yet, anyway. If someone would come forward with the right amount of cash we would do it...maybe a DBX show is in order!
So we'll wrap up what was one of the craziest years of my life, next time...
Miss an update? Impossible! Go here to reminisce